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Current time: December 15, 2024, 12:49 pm

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joke time
RE: joke time
How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb?

One.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Reply
RE: joke time
Got the sack today from my job as a mime artist. Must have been something I said.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Reply
RE: joke time
Here is a visual joke you can play on folks:

In your right hand you palm a small screw. Don't let it be seen.

In your left hand you show a nickel and a dime. (That is a five cent and ten cent piece for those across the ponds.)

You say: "Want to see a nickel screwin a dime?"

You the cup your hands together and shake them for a few seconds.

Open your hands to reveal a nickel, screw, and a dime.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!






Reply
RE: joke time
Might've posted this before-

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess,
“Will you marry me?”
The Princess immediately said, “No!”
And the Prince lived happily ever after, and rode motorcycles and dated thin, long-legged, full-breasted women, and hunted and fished and raced cars, and went to titty bars and dated ladies half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Bundaberg Rum, and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony, and dated barmaids and kept his house and boat, and ate potato chips and beans, and blew enormous farts, and never got cheated on while he was at work, and all his friends and family thought he was friggin cool as hell, and he had tons of money in the bank, and left the toilet seat up.
The End.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
He he... I was waiting for the punchline! Silly me.

Why do married men die first? Because they want to.
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
(September 7, 2017 at 9:38 pm)ignoramus Wrote: He he... I was waiting for the punchline! Silly me.

Why do married men die first? Because they want to.

I'm searching through my pile of jokes and bookmarks, but it's going to take some time to find the reciprocal version for teh wimmens. There is one, just for them. I'm all about equal opportunity.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
Iggy and Min's trial for murdering their wives to keep them from reading this will come up next week.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Reply
RE: joke time
Resistance is futile, if < 1 ohm.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
Wire you insulate?
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Reply
RE: joke time
Don't be reVOLTing.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Reply



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