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Current time: May 15, 2024, 6:47 am

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joke time
RE: joke time
'Jaysus.  I send him out with a list, he comes back with a list and a half.' - Mrs. Shannon (for realsies)

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: joke time
That's why the wife won't take me grocery shopping.
She's in the veggie isle and I go straight for the chips, lollies and frozen dinners...
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
My shopping is the other way around. I can go to CostCo with a list and get asked about all the stuff I didn't bring home that wasn't on the list. Takes me 45 minutes, including driving time. The wife goes and comes back about 2 hours later with all kinds of stuff that's gonna rot before we get to it. I have a foot surgery coming up, (getting a neat little knee scooter instead of crutches!). I'm trying to get the scooter early so that I can rig it for carrying my food to the table. It's going to be a few weeks of no cooking, laundry or house cleaning for the old Fireball.  Angel
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
Quote:In space, two aliens are talking to each other.
The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."

The second alien asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"

The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have aimed at themselves"
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RE: joke time
What kind of exercise do lazy people do?


No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?




Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply
RE: joke time
I'm never getting married again.

I'll just buy some woman I hate a house.
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RE: joke time
Fun fact, Trump was the old fart on the golf course and The New Kids On The Block ripped off his original lyrics.


"Oh O Oh O Oh O orange turd, What's in my asshole, A BUTT PLUG"
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RE: joke time
When I was in a wheelchair I wanted to be a stand- up comedian........
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RE: joke time
Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?


Neither one, they both eat out.
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