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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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joke time
The Valkyrie Offline
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#4871
RE: joke time
May 2, 2021 at 8:54 am
I never liked the term? "Anal bleaching".

I prefer calling it, "changing your ringtone".
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#4872
RE: joke time
May 2, 2021 at 8:56 am
A goose is waiting to cross the road.

A chicken behind him says, "I woudn't bother, mate. You'll never hear the fucking end of it!"
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onlinebiker Offline
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#4873
RE: joke time
May 2, 2021 at 12:34 pm
Why did chicken cross the road?

To prove to the opossum that it CAN be done.
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4874
RE: joke time
May 3, 2021 at 4:58 am
It would be terrible for the CEO of IKEA to be elected prime minister of Sweden. He'd spend all his time assembling his cabinet.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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vulcanlogician Offline
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#4875
RE: joke time
May 3, 2021 at 10:24 am
A man goes to a hospital and sees a man masturbating.

He asks the nurse why is he doing so. The nurse explains to him that if he doesn't masturbate every 6 hours there would be a clot and he would die. Then in the next room, he sees a nurse giving a blowjob to a guy. He then says, "You will have to explain this." The nurse replies, "Same problem better insurance."
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#4876
RE: joke time
May 4, 2021 at 9:08 pm
Tim is cuddling under the blankets with his wife on a very cold night.

"My arse is freezing!" she says.

"Let me check, " Tim says and goes under the blanket. A few moments later he reappears and say, "It's like Siberia!"

"It's that cold?" she laughs.

"No, it's fucking massive!"

Tim will be missed.

In lieu of flowers, the family has asked people to make donations to battered stupid men charities.
Dying to live, living to die.
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#4877
RE: joke time
May 4, 2021 at 9:11 pm
Joe was kicked out of school for letting a girl give him a hand-job.

"That's three schools in two years!" his mother says angrilly!

"If you keep this up, you"ll never be allowed to teach again!"
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4878
RE: joke time
May 5, 2021 at 5:18 am
I'm writing a book about how to survive a fall down a staircase. It'll be a step-by-step guide.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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Darinda Offline
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#4879
RE: joke time
May 5, 2021 at 10:29 am
An atheist and a Christian strike up a conversation on a short plane flight.
The Christian can't help himself and suggests that they discuss God.
The Atheist asks if he can ask a question first.

He asks, since the cow, the deer and the horse all eat grass, why do they poo patties, pellets and clumps?
The Theist shrugs and says he has no idea?

The atheist then asks: You wish to talk about God, the creator of the universe but you don't know shit?
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#4880
RE: joke time
May 6, 2021 at 3:57 am
Keeping tropical fish at home can have a calming effect on the human brain. You know, because of all the indoor fins.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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