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joke time
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I was walking to work this morning, when someone threw an old German coin at me.
It hit me on the forehead. I thought, "Well, that's going to leave a mark!" Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"  RE: joke time
October 19, 2022 at 5:12 pm
(This post was last modified: October 19, 2022 at 8:27 pm by BrianSoddingBoru4.)
The cops just knocked on my door to tell me that our cats have been chasing people on their bikes.
Our cats don’t even OWN bikes. Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
What did the bathtub say to the toilet?
I get a lot of ass but I don't take no shit.
teachings of the Bible are so muddled and self-contradictory that it was possible for Christians to happily burn heretics alive for five long centuries. It was even possible for the most venerated patriarchs of the Church, like St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas, to conclude that heretics should be tortured (Augustine) or killed outright (Aquinas). Martin Luther and John Calvin advocated the wholesale murder of heretics, apostates, Jews, and witches. - Sam Harris, "Letter To A Christian Nation"
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
 (October 21, 2022 at 1:16 am)Fake Messiah Wrote: What did the bathtub say to the toilet? Tell that to my one year-old, at bath time...
Disappointing theists since 1968!
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall.
The owner asks the clerk, “What’s with that guy over there by the wall?” The clerk says, “Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn’t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative.” The owner says, “You idiot! You can’t treat a cough with a bottle of laxatives!” The clerk says, “Of course, you can! Look at him; he’s afraid to cough!”
A woman asked an Army General when the last time he had made love to a woman. The general replied “1956, ma’am.”
The woman, in disbelief said “1956?! That long? Come with me and let me make your night better.” The woman and general went back to her apartment and made passionate love for over an hour. Afterwards, the woman cuddled up to the general and said “Well, you sure haven’t forgotten anything since 1956…” The general looked at her, confused, and replied “I sure hope not, it’s only 2130 now.”
Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd break into a distillery. Daffy asks, ‘Is this whiskey?’ and Elmer answers, ‘Yes, but not as whiskey as wobbing a bank.’
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
‘Tell your new girlfriend we said Merry Christmas.’
‘Susan doesn’t celebrate Christmas.’ ‘Really? Why not?’ ‘She’s a Jehovah’s Witness.’ ‘Oh, sorry. Well, tell her we said “knock knock”, then.’ Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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