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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Off Topic v
101 uses for Bible

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101 uses for Bible
Edwardo Piet Away
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#21
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 4:02 pm
Banned for stealing Darwinian's way to use the Bible.

Wait... wrong thread.

17. Great to point and laugh at.
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Eilonnwy Offline
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#22
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 4:09 pm
(August 22, 2010 at 8:46 am)Paul the Human Wrote: 9: Smashing cockroaches.

I used the Book of Mormon once for smashing a large flying insect.

As for the bible, could probably roll up a joint. Smile

Dar already said cigarette papers, basically the same thing.

Hmm...18. You can play hide the Bible in hotels.
"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason." Benjamin Franklin

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Entropist Offline
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#23
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 5:03 pm
(August 22, 2010 at 12:30 pm)Cego_Colher Wrote: A book box- I'm not sure if that's what it's called, but you glue all the pages together, except one for the opening and cut a hole in the middle of all of them. So it looks like a book, but is actually a box.


--Like that old western where Robert Mitchum plays a gunslinger disguised as a pastor-- his Bible is hollowed out and he carries a pistol in it (I forget the name of the film).
“Society is not a disease, it is a disaster. What a stupid miracle that one can live in it.” ~ E.M. Cioran
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Shell B Offline
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#24
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 5:20 pm
19. For the autistic kid up the street to chew on. (Yes, he chews on books. No, I'm not being an asshole about autism.)
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Rhage Offline
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#25
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 5:20 pm (This post was last modified: August 22, 2010 at 5:21 pm by Rhage.)
20. A booster step for us short people.

Sometimes you just need an extra inch or two to reach the cookies. : )
Nothing is your own except the few cubic centimeters inside your skull. - George Orwell
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The Omnissiunt One Offline
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#26
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 5:27 pm
To paste the pages on the walls of the bedroom, to freak out anyone who comes in.
'We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.' H.L. Mencken

'False religion' is the ultimate tautology.

'It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.' Mark Twain

'I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.' Abraham Lincoln
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DiRNiS Offline
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#27
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 6:29 pm
22. To make stupid people say the truth and nothing but the truth in court.
Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

Atheist I Evolved!
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Entropist Offline
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#28
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 6:34 pm (This post was last modified: August 22, 2010 at 6:34 pm by Entropist.)
23. To give extra leverage for dry humping.
“Society is not a disease, it is a disaster. What a stupid miracle that one can live in it.” ~ E.M. Cioran
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DiRNiS Offline
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#29
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 8:35 pm
24. To scare children with its verses about demons and eternal hellfire.
Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

Atheist I Evolved!
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chasm Offline
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#30
RE: 101 uses for Bible
August 22, 2010 at 8:38 pm
25. Clean up spills
Eeyore Wrote:Thanks for noticing.
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Off Topic v
101 uses for Bible

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