Guess where I hid my special medication.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
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Current time: April 27, 2024, 3:22 pm
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Things not to say when being arrested
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"Your sister didn't complain about the drugs."
Lemme grab my other id.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
I’m not drunk. I’m whiskey enhanced.
teachings of the Bible are so muddled and self-contradictory that it was possible for Christians to happily burn heretics alive for five long centuries. It was even possible for the most venerated patriarchs of the Church, like St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas, to conclude that heretics should be tortured (Augustine) or killed outright (Aquinas). Martin Luther and John Calvin advocated the wholesale murder of heretics, apostates, Jews, and witches. - Sam Harris, "Letter To A Christian Nation"
 
Can I snort the rest of that before you handcuff me?
“If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.” — Confucius 
The body was in the trunk when I rented it.
Do not say what everybody else says:
"How many drinks have you had today?" "Six, maybe seven. Definitely not two."  RE: Things not to say when being arrested
February 13, 2021 at 12:31 pm
(This post was last modified: February 13, 2021 at 12:55 pm by Nay_Sayer.)
"Please officer I'm just 9 years old"
"For the only way to eternal glory is a life lived in service of our Lord, FSM; Verily it is FSM who is the perfect being the name higher than all names, king of all kings and will bestow upon us all, one day, The great reclaiming" -The Prophet Boiardi-
Conservative trigger warning.
![[Image: s-l640.jpg]](https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/DjAAAOSwpIhe1HCM/s-l640.jpg) RE: Things not to say when being arrested
February 13, 2021 at 12:37 pm
(This post was last modified: February 13, 2021 at 12:39 pm by Brian37.)
"I recorded myself at the Capital".
FBI, "Yea, we know dumbass." Actually true story a few years ago. Some idiot walked into a police station to report that his cocaine got stolen. The police had to have been thinking "Oh really, do tell me more.". |
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