Random Humorous Things - A Light-Hearted Thread

[Haipule]

The Good, Bad, Ugly--and the cat! Cool tune!

https://youtu.be/dm5ipvmAMK0

[purplepurpose]

https://www.christianforums.com/threads/...s.8038875/

[Dave B]

Santa is all powerful!

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[Haipule]

Santa and Superman have a lot in common. They both wear red suits, they both fly and they both have beards.--Jack Handy

[pocaracas]

Santa and Superman have a lot in common. They both wear red suits, they both fly and they both have beards.--Jack Handy

hmmmm

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Just couldn't not share!

[Haipule]

https://www.christianforums.com/threads/...s.8038875/

I used to think my “spiritual gift” was exhortation. But how can you have a gift you can’t even pronounce?  I was asked once to take the offering at church and I told the whole church that my “spiritual gift” was extortion. They never asked me again.

 

I now know that my “spiritual gift” is interpretation of tongues. Although nobody in my church speaks in tongues, I did go to the local Pentecostal church to try out my gift. It’s true, I can actually understand what they are saying but I’m not sure why they are saying it. One guy kept on telling “knock knock” jokes but never gave us the punch line. I kept yelling, “Panda who?!” The guy next to me was saying that the ass of the girl in front of him was “So sweet it gave him a toothache”. And a guy across the room from me kept yelling, in an old Moab language, “I’m gay, I’m really, really gay!” It was not edifying; although I did find myself “rolling in the aisle”. But actually, I was ROFLMAO!

[zebo-the-fat]

Conversation overheard in a pub, "I put the christmas tree up this morning, then the dog pissed on it!"

[Rev. Rye]

In these fucked-up times, here's something that's utterly hilarious.

It's called True Capitalist Radio, and it's basically your standard right-wing talk radio show, except for one thing: the show is infested with people who do whatever they can to piss him off, and it's not that hard, given that things that enrage him include:

• Misidentifying him as anything from a racist, midget, Jew, hambone (a term he uses for overweight people), gay, 
  
• Poking fun at tragedies that hit close to him (one that's notable is the arrival of cannibal shrimp in the Gulf eating the ones he likes before he gets the chance to)
  
• Insulting his family.
  
• Shaming Texas
  
• Nickelback
  
• NASA in general
  
• Comparing him to Alex Jones
  
• My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
  
• Anime (especially Pokemon)
  
• Callers saying they prefer his call screener The Engineer to him
  
• And many, MANY more, ranging from the understandable to the absolutely nonsensical...
  

Here are some selected moments:

[Dave B]

[Dave B]