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Ask your Creator.
#1
Ask your Creator.
Okay, since I'm channelling God for another thread, it might be a good opportunity to ask Him an y questions that might be lurking in your mind about your existence.

If you have any questions, please ask away and I will get God to answer for you.*


And, GO!



*I accept no responsibility for the accuracy of the answer, or any impending eternal damnation that may result.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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#2
RE: Ask your Creator.
I torment myself over the right type of colander to wear on special occasions; Colored plastic to match my tie or Stainless Steel to preserve your wholesome noodly teachings?
"For the only way to eternal glory is a life lived in service of our Lord, FSM; Verily it is FSM who is the perfect being the name higher than all names, king of all kings and will bestow upon us all, one day, The great reclaiming"  -The Prophet Boiardi-

   
  Conservative trigger warning.
[Image: s-l640.jpg][Image: shopping?q=tbn:ANd9GcSBjdQ4tzp0y16OBYXxG...s&usqp=CAc]
                                                                                         
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#3
RE: Ask your Creator.
Why are you so happy with this?


Quote:
Quote:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.

Psalm 137
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#4
RE: Ask your Creator.
(October 11, 2017 at 5:46 pm)Nay_Sayer Wrote: I torment myself over the right type of colander to wear on special occasions;  Colored plastic to match my tie or Stainless Steel to preserve your wholesome noodly teachings?

Stainless steel.

It has the added advantage of protecting you from Bozo Rays™ being projected into your brain by the Shadow Government, just as tinfoil hats do.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#5
RE: Ask your Creator.
Answer the question you already know I'm going to ask before I ask it.
"What a little moonlight can do." ~ Billie Holiday
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#6
RE: Ask your Creator.
(October 11, 2017 at 5:47 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Why are you so happy with this?

It's embarrassing to admit this, but I was stoned out of My cosmic brain when I wrote that.

Just ignore those bits that you don't like and think shouldn't apply to you and you can be a good Christian, too.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#7
RE: Ask your Creator.
(October 11, 2017 at 5:50 pm)Lutrinae Wrote: Answer the question you already know I'm going to ask before I ask it.

The only way to make it bigger is surgery.


And, to the secret question you ask yourself, No, otters would not make good condoms.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#8
RE: Ask your Creator.
(October 11, 2017 at 5:54 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: The only way to make it bigger is surgery.


And, to the secret question you ask yourself, No, otters would not make good condoms.

So, the Kardashian booty is a go.

And there goes my multi-million dollar idea.
"What a little moonlight can do." ~ Billie Holiday
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#9
RE: Ask your Creator.
Why, God, did you make me so fucking loveable, dickhead?
Reply
#10
RE: Ask your Creator.
(October 11, 2017 at 5:58 pm)Gawdzilla Sama Wrote: Why, God, did you make me so fucking loveable, dickhead?

I'll take that to be two questions.

I made you loveable because someone has to be as loveable as you, and there are so few in the world.

I made you a dickhead because everyone needs a flaw.

Wink

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply



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