(June 5, 2012 at 4:50 pm)zentor Wrote: its not so easy every second i suffer no one can udnerstand my pain

this is my only escape - lithium tablets and alchohol

I told you he was hardcore.

heres more proof

1. got banned from my suicidal forum
2. got banned from SWGEMU, i SPENT FUCKING HOURS GRINDING MY CHARACTER AND FOR SAYING I WANT TO DIE I GET BANNED AN DALL MY WORK IS GONE

FUCK MY LIFE FUCK U F8UFJING GOD FUCK U PIECE OF SHIT JESUS FUCK U FUCK FUCK U

Hmm. Something smells decidedly wrong here.

F YOU C KAY JESUS ASSHOLE UR A BITCH WHO DONT LIKE MY SHIT?

WELL SUCK A DIRTY DICK WITH GONORRHEA ON THE TIP IM SICK OF YOU CUNT ASS BITCH

IM GOING ON DISABILITY I WONT DO ANYTHING U DONT LIKE IT U CAN SUCK MY DICK!

IF U FUCK ME AGAIN WHILE IM FEELING SUICIDAL SEE THAT WINDOW? ILL HOP OUT THAT BITCH!!!

sorry, paul that was directed at jesus not you, was goign to merge post - but then u posted i guess

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and i agree life is defintiely over rated

You need to stop blaming god for the things wrong in your life. It implies that you have no control over your life.

(June 6, 2012 at 4:09 pm)zentor Wrote: sorry, paul that was directed at jesus not you, was goign to merge post - but then u posted i guess

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and i agree life is defintiely over rated

Seriously dude, look at your other posts. You're oscillating between being one way and then totally "IMMA GONNA DIEEE!!"

Does that not strike you as bizarre?

Since this appears to be an ongoing issue and I do not want to deal with this on a routine basis, perhaps you can explain to us what you feel is driving you crazy. Maybe we can provide a sounding board and help you calm down.

Also, STOP TAKING LITHIUM WITH ALCOHOL. QUIT THE ALCOHOL. NOW

I have a heavy suspicion you are doing this even now.

STOP THAT. STOP THAT RIGHT NOW.

It is medically inadvisable and will drive your bipolar nature into a fit.

Due to the alcohol, you're changing your blood lithium levels erratically.

You WILL feel BAD.

Soldier through it.

I was on a heavy dose of lamictal for a year. Coming off it was the worst drug comedown I've ever had -- I wanted to kill myself and got dangerously close to it for three weeks. I couldn't sleep, I could barely eat, everyone was plotting to make me angry (this is what I felt at the time).

Once the pain ended, I was glad I clung to life (I love myself waaay to much to kill myself...).

You will do so as well.

The pain will end.

Keep telling yourself that. It's the only way you can hang on when your drugs go bad.

Even without the lithium, zentor, alcohol and depression of any kind do not mix well. It's best to stay away from it even if you're not on any medication.

Dude no - i am not taking alchohol with lithium! I took that picture the otherday because i told my guild that i would OD and die with my meds, and they said "pics or it didnt happen" so i took that pic an dposted it on the forum

And dude i am upset, because no matter HOW HARD i try to get better - I NEVER DO

because i know that god is screwing me. please i know u guys are like , yeah we are in control of our lives
but i am NOT
i try my best to be stable, to get better to do things right

but my situations i end up in ARE NOT JUST COINCIDENCE

god screws with me

ie: when my gf cheated on me, i was just depresed, but ALL day god would show me all the happy couples on campus - he was rubbing it in

and last week i was thinking okay ill never do college ill be on disability - well mom took me out, and i saw all the college kids in our town partying down town and having fun

DO YOU SEE? CAN U EVEN SEE WHAT I AM GORING THROUGH? i know most atheists just believe in science - BUT PLEAES TRY TO SEE WHAT I SEE

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and no faith i dont drink - i got alchohol poisoning in 10th grade trying to impress girls and i say screw alchohol

besides it just makes me feel sick i dont like it