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Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
#11
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
This is your captain speaking...does anyone know how to land one of these?
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#12
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
Our inflight movie today will be The Passion of the Christ.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
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#13
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
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#14
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
Plane is shaking violently:

"Attention passengers. If you look out the right side of the aircraft, you will see some parachutes. That is the crew." *Beeeep*
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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#15
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
(February 16, 2021 at 4:45 pm)brewer Wrote: Our inflight movie today will be The Passion of the Christ.

What a terrible movie.  It is like Mel Gibson masturbating to torture.
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#16
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
"God is my co-pilot"
If The Flintstones have taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.

-Homer Simpson
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#17
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
(February 16, 2021 at 8:11 pm)Mermaid Wrote: "God is my co-pilot"
I am always amused to see that incredibly arrogant bumper sticker commentary.


A co-pilot is almost always a less experienced pilot there to learn from the guy in the left seat....
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#18
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
(February 16, 2021 at 4:43 pm)arewethereyet Wrote: This is your captain speaking...does anyone know how to land one of these?

Best one yet! Hilarious
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#19
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
(February 16, 2021 at 1:52 pm)Brian37 Wrote: On a passenger jet. 

"I'll have another martini"

" I am so depressed, my wife left me."

"I lost my contacts, cant see a thing without them."

"Altimeter? Who needs that?"

" I used to be a stunt pilot, lets try some barrel rolls."

"Why are we landing at LAX? I'm not backed up."

"Damn that was some good acid"

"We'll be landing in North Korea, estimated ETA 16 hours."
"A mountain goat?" 

"We need those wings right?"

"I'm sure that red blinking light is nothing "

"Is that suppose to be on fire?"

"Let's buzz the tower"

'There is something on the wing!"

Some more 

"Ha it's just a thunderstorm"

"I'm pretty sure this is a seaplane "

"The landing gear was there a minute ago"

"Were going to space !!!!!"
"Change was inevitable"


Nemo sicut deus debet esse!

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 “No matter what men think, abortion is a fact of life. Women have always had them; they always have and they always will. Are they going to have good ones or bad ones? Will the good ones be reserved for the rich, while the poor women go to quacks?”
–SHIRLEY CHISHOLM


      
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#20
RE: Things you don't want to hear your pilot say.
"Don't panic, but...."
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