how to live as an Atheist in a Christian family

[Polaris]

Fake it...it's not like it's going to matter if you already don't believe.

Fuck you dude. What fucking country do we live in here??? No one should have to fake believing in something for any reason in a free society. This is the typical horse shit answer of a dirtbag christian: "Do whatever to get by, and just cower in fear until it's clear to live free. " What a shitty piece of advice. Seriously ... FUCK YOU!

Mind anyone reading this, this would not work if your family tends to be the intelligent Christians...they don't buy it for a second.

"Intelligent Christians" that's hilarious. As if such a thing could even exist.
Believing in all-powerful wizards, talking animals, men floating into space and eternal life in a gated community covered in gold - pretty much rules out any and ALL possibilities of intelligence.

Christians, like every other ludicrous blood-cult, are fucktards. You are remnants of a primitive time. You all still fight with each other about who has the real god the way toddlers fight over who owns the shiny matchbox car at the daycare. Intelligence? Please ... what a joke. You people think that a 2000 year dead jew is going to come back floating just above the ground and take you all to a magical fairyland for the rest of time. You are all idiots.





Don't listen to the Christian. Let them ridicule and give it back in equal stride. Remind them of the stupidity that their religion shares with EVERY OTHER religion.

And this is how you end up all alone. No one likes a hateful and stupid prick who needs to learn the world doesn't fucking care about your beliefs.

[pineapplebunnybounce]

Maybe ask them what they're trying to achieve. If they think making life hell for you would make you think that they believe in an all loving god. Ask them if jesus would do what they're doing. Tell them that from what they've done so far, you're more convinced than ever that you were right to stop believing and they should think about how to answer to god about sending their own to hell.

Ok that last part is a bit spicy, but you get the drift. Guilt trip them into becoming so-called "good christians" to reconvert you.

Then ask them if they would believe in islam if they lived with a muslim family that constantly ridicules them for being christian. People can't help what they believe and not believe in. Once they realize that they may ease off.

[elizabeth_the_skeptic]

Maybe ask them what they're trying to achieve. If they think making life hell for you would make you think that they believe in an all loving god. Ask them if jesus would do what they're doing. Tell them that from what they've done so far, you're more convinced than ever that you were right to stop believing and they should think about how to answer to god about sending their own to hell.

Ok that last part is a bit spicy, but you get the drift. Guilt trip them into becoming so-called "good christians" to reconvert you.

Then ask them if they would believe in islam if they lived with a muslim family that constantly ridicules them for being christian. People can't help what they believe and not believe in. Once they realize that they may ease off.

That's actually a really good idea, thank you. I'm not sure whether it will work, but it's certainly worth a try!

[Minimalist]

If they are as batshit crazy as the OP suggests they will simply come back with the "we are trying to save your soul" bullshit. Xtians trot that out whenever they get caught looking like bastards.

But its worth a try.

[Whateverist]

There is one other card you can play that might work. Grandkids. Tell them that while there is no chance you'll ever be a believer, you sure would like your kids to grow up in a loving relationship with their grandparents. You sure would hope your kids would see that while you believe different things, you're still all family who love and respect each other .. yada, yada, guilt, veiled threat.

[pineapplebunnybounce]

Glad i can help, hope it works out.

If you fail: i need to go to the library to study. Works all the time. i have friends who would take summer courses just to stay away from home. Get out early in the day, spend your day out, ostensibly to study, then go home late at night. If you manage to find a part time job, even better. Whenever I have a parttime job during school, I literally spend at least 12 hours out every weekday. Or just say that you have a parttime job. If you can't find a job, find a club in school that meets up often. Join 3 clubs to fill your schedule.

If you get creative, you really only need to go home to sleep

[Angrboda]

I find that violently lashing out at random tends to keep people's minds preoccupied with something other than the fate of my eternal soul.

Become a "problem teenager." Give them something else to worry about, to get their mind off converting you.

Go Goth. Get a piercing. Get a tattoo. Kick the neighbor's dog. Develop a drinking problem. Put powdered sugar on your nostrils when you come home. Burn a cross in someone's lawn.


But by all means, have fun while you're doing it. And stay safe!

[pocaracas]

If they are as batshit crazy as the OP suggests they will simply come back with the "we are trying to save your soul" bullshit. Xtians trot that out whenever they get caught looking like bastards.

But its worth a try.

That was the excuse the Inquisition gave... and look how well it went...Hey, waitaminute!
If they come up with this one... just roll out the inquisition card.... no decent god fearing christian likes to be paired with those guys... I think.

---

I find that violently lashing out at random tends to keep people's minds preoccupied with something other than the fate of my eternal soul.

Become a "problem teenager." Give them something else to worry about, to get their mind off converting you.

Go Goth. Get a piercing. Get a tattoo. Kick the neighbor's dog. Develop a drinking problem. Put powdered sugar on your nostrils when you come home. Burn a cross in someone's lawn.


But by all means, have fun while you're doing it. And stay safe!

That may backfire a bit too much, don't you think?
Problem teenagers tend to become problem adults... even if they're just acting at being problematic... you are what you do.

To the OP, Be true to yourself. You are what you are.
If your parents can't see that and accept it, you have some enduring to do. You'll feel like crap (a bit more than you already do), but, in the end, you'll become an adult with your own life: job, family, friends, etc.

Generally speaking, parents only want the best for their children.
Ask them why they're doing this thing which is making your life miserable.
Why is your belief in their deity so important to them?
Ask them to stop it and just let you live in peace.
And, most important, always be polite.... show them that you learned that lesson well and it's a valuable lesson.... unlike the belief one.

Just ask your parents to be parents. Try to make them see that there's no evidence whatsoever for the existence of any god, nor for souls, nor for ghosts. And you refuse to be intellectually dishonest and assume they exist nonetheless.

About ghosts... http://science.howstuffworks.com/science...ghost3.htm... they're all in your mind.

If you're willing, the faking belief is a perfectly valid option, IMHO... but not very easy to keep up for long. My experience says that lying is a very difficult thing to keep up.
Small lies can be easily forgotten about.... larger ones... that need maintenance... those are hell... all it takes is one tiny slip-up and you're caught.

[Whateverist]

I find that violently lashing out at random tends to keep people's minds preoccupied with something other than the fate of my eternal soul.

Become a "problem teenager." Give them something else to worry about, to get their mind off converting you.

Go Goth. Get a piercing. Get a tattoo. Kick the neighbor's dog. Develop a drinking problem. Put powdered sugar on your nostrils when you come home. Burn a cross in someone's lawn.


But by all means, have fun while you're doing it. And stay safe!

All reasonable suggestions except, obviously, for the one involving the neighbor's dog. WTF you sick twisted bastard. hock:

[Rahul]

I am 19 years old, a college student, and I am an Atheist living in a Christian family. They all know, and they are all livid about it. My mom isn't terrible, but my father makes me go to church twice a week, once to talk to this man from church who is a professor at a Christian university. He is constantly trying to engage me in debates so that he can re-convert me, though he keeps failing miserably. I am currently in Texas for a week with my uncle, who I have learned was told by my father to talk to me about all of this. They are all absolutely abusive to me, laughing at me, calling me names, and degrading me. I have been looking for a job for months, but so far to no avail, and as I have no friends with an open room, for now I have to stay at my house. I'm absolutely miserable, and I'm at my wit's end. I don't know what else to say to them, because no argument, no matter how valid, will keep them from laughing at me, and they insist upon talking about this 3 times a day. Can anyone help me?

Ok. Damage control time.

First off, and I'm sure you realize this, you should never have openly outted yourself to your family at this point in your life. At most you should have referred to yourself as agnostic. The average christian, when they hear agnostic, think of what is in reality an agnostic atheist. When they hear atheist, they think of a fire breathing strong, in your face atheist.

I grew up in Texas to devout Southern Baptists, but I didn't stop believing until I was well out of the house. Yet even today I have never really broached the subject, even though my parents realize I don't have anything to do with religion any longer. There's no point in sticking your foot in the ant hill. It's not going to do anything but cause trouble.

This is what, in my opinion, you need to do.

First, stop arguing. Completely. Stop it. Not one more argument against anything. Don't defend your beliefs, don't mention your beliefs, just stop.

What you want to come off as, is silently contemplative. If they ridicule you, just quietly look at them like you are listening to them telling a fishing story and appear like you are quietly thinking. If they really try to get you to react just tell them that there are a lot of things going on in your head that you are trying to figure out and you need some time to figure those things out. If they keep pushing you, at most, say, "Look, I'm only 19! I still have a lot of things to learn."

This should automatically make your parents think, "Well yeah, she is young. Maybe this is just a phase."

Two, allow them to catch you reading parts of the bible around the house. Now you're probably think, "Fuck, I've got to read the bible? Shit!" Actually, it's good to know more of the bible simply so you know the crap you're going to have to put up with in our society. I keep an online version of the King James Bible on my computer that I use for reference all the time. Since you will be reading the bible you might as well read things that will be useful. For your particular situation I would read about "The Wayward Son" Luke Chapter 15 Verses 11-32.

This story represents the attitude of our Father God toward us as His children. When we fail to fulfill the duties that God expects of us He does not disown us as children. God loves us dearly, and the sacrifice of Jesus in our behalf allows us to enjoy complete forgiveness by God when we ask for forgiveness.

This would be something you could ask your parents about if they start needling you. When you ask, act like you value their insight into this story and what you should know about it. Act like you are honestly inquisitive and would really like to hear what they think. This should be an eye opener for how they are treating you. Don't say anything other than to ask respectful questions. Then depart with a thoughtful look.

Another good thing to read just for your own personal knowledge would be the book of Job. Holy crap that's a fucked up story about how god treats his followers. Short book. But a good one for an atheist to know.

Remember don't react to their insults. Just be quietly contemplative. The only time you should mention anything about religion around them is to act what comes off as honestly curious questions. Like you are putting forth a real effort to learn more about the bible.

I feel for you. Sorry you're in this situation. Remember, this isn't going to last forever.