The Cause of All Our Problems

[Faith No More]

I used to have problems with my father, but I was able to let go of them when I realized that his issues stemmed from how he suffered under his parents. Understanding who he was from that perspective helped me, but a big part of it may also be due to the fact that he did everything he could to stop the cycle of abuse. I'm not sure how forgiving I would have been had he been just like his father.

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I was not responsible for being raped by my father and his friends.

I really hope this is metaphorical, because that seems like a little too much to forgive.

[Fruity]

Raeven wrote:

You may have to try on a few different shrinks to find one who is a good fit. They are not all created equal.

This is true. Having worked in a behavioral health clinic and being a witness of the work ethics and systems of different "shrinks" I can say they are not all created equal. Raerae nailed it. Shop around.

[Jackalope]

What were your parents or guardians like when you were growing up?

@futilethewinds - I don't know what to say. I wish your childhood would have been far different.

My father, while he was physically around and provided for the family financially, was emotionally unavailable - and still is to this day. Alcoholic. Too self-absorbed to be much use.

My alcoholic mother (at the time, dry for 25 years) emotionally abandoned me before I turned 10. In her words "I just gave up on you". She apologized for it when I was 42. I forgave her, but I still have trouble trusting her. I rarely speak to her or see her, even though she lives less than a mile away.

I was a particularly troubled kid. Thing is, they knew it, and left me to twist in the wind.

I wish I could say more, but every time I try to do so, I get this weird writer's block - I can't make the words come out.

[Jackalope]

Raeven wrote:

You may have to try on a few different shrinks to find one who is a good fit. They are not all created equal.

This is true. Having worked in a behavioral health clinic and being a witness of the work ethics and systems of different "shrinks" I can say they are not all created equal. Raerae nailed it. Shop around.

+1

This is absolutely true. Shop around until you find a good fit.