I'm getting confirmed Catholic...

[Mystical]

Lion you do understand that by the mere fact he/she doesn't believe, he's breaking those commandments right? In your good ole Bible it states parents should do all kinds of things to their nonbelieving family ranging from ostracization: to stoning them to death. My fundie dad thinks gays should be put to death, therefore I haven't told him I'm a bisexual. I choose not to tell him ---not for me, but for him. I dont want him to have to deal with the conflict he'd feel and also because I dont want to be ostracized from my own father and lose the relationship I have with him. Without him I'd be fine, but I'm all he's got.
This kid already said he makes it known his opinion and they still are pushing for extreme church involvement. The best thing to do in this case is deal with it for a couple years and hold onto the relationship they have because in the end: that's what matters. Furthermore no one told him to lie about his beliefs; if his parents know he/she doesn't believe and dare still fine with the confirmation taking place then that's their choice and who are we to say otherwise? I for one can't pay this kids rent and food can you? We said just do your best with what you got. If the parents' prerequisite is to belong to their club then its a small price to pay for the sanctity of that relationship.
The reality of the matter is that your belief system pulls families apart.
We choose to love you guys despite your beliefs. Too bad its not the other way around..

[Lion IRC]

Tell the truth Wunsbee.
It will set you free (and its easier to remember.)

Shame on people here for encouraging you to lie about your beliefs - your atheist beliefs.
The 5th Commandment says honor your parents.
The 9th Commandment says bearing false witness (lying) is wrong.

Be true to yourself. Go and hug your parents and talk to them in truth and love.

Dont worry about what people might think. Popularity is overrated.

Obviously telling the truth would be better. But he's 16 and his parents sound like ignorant bigoted bastards to me. They could throw him out! Its got nothing to do with popularity dumbass. I guess you've never been in this position have you

SHE is 16.

How about you cut HER parents some slack and give them the benefit of the doubt that they probably love HER very much and would sympathise if they knew the TRUTH.

Certainly the parish priest (assuming he isn't a closet atheist) would not want her to proceed with a fake confirmation.

And no, I have never been in that position of uncertainty. And i have been blessed with loving parents who taught me that if you have to lie to be popular then you are probably only "popular" with other liars.

---

In honouring your parents you teach your children how to honour THEIRS

[Bad Wolf]

Where the fuck does popularity come into this equation? atheism is not popular, she isn't exactly lying about it either. Her parents are just in denial, plain and simple.

[Captain Colostomy]

Obviously telling the truth would be better. But he's 16 and his parents sound like ignorant bigoted bastards to me. They could throw him out! Its got nothing to do with popularity dumbass. I guess you've never been in this position have you

SHE is 16.

How about you cut HER parents some slack and give them the benefit of the doubt that they probably love HER very much and would sympathise if they knew the TRUTH.

Certainly the parish priest (assuming he isn't a closet atheist) would not want her to proceed with a fake confirmation.

And no, I have never been in that position of uncertainty. And i have been blessed with loving parents who taught me that if you have to lie to be popular then you are probably only "popular" with other liars.

---

In honouring your parents you teach your children how to honour THEIRS

Life ain't always black and white, genius. Honesty isn't always the best policy. I suppose a follower of a cult that venerates martyrs won't be able to see that, so instead I'll just say... STFU.

[Lion IRC]

Oh yeah. Sure. We can do that all day long.
Shut up. No you shut up. NO YOU!
Life ain't always black and white - therefore lie about being a Christian when you're not.

...I never believed those prison stats about the #atheists in jails.

---

And ya wonder why I am suspicious about a link between pedophiles hiding in the clergy and atheists hiding in the clergy.

[KichigaiNeko]

I have to spend over 5 hours at church every week, take confirmation classes, go on retreats, go to bible study, etc. And I have to get confirmed a Catholic. My parents aren't leaving me much of a choice and it's bothering me so much. I'm going to loose my mind! What should I do?:/ Should I go along with it to keep the peace?):

tolerate it for now little one. You are 16, wait until you are older and not so dependant on your parents.

Keep questioning

[The Reality Salesman01]

Do I (sound like you at 16)? How so? I actually debate people all the time and I can defend my atheism but my mother doesn't care about logic, might as well defend my view to a brick wall...

That's good that you debate people all the time. I say that you remind me of myself because I was raised in a hardcore Christian home in Texas. My mom is an absolute loon when it comes to the things she's willing to believe, and doesn't understand logic or how to apply it to any proposition whatsoever. So, I get what you're saying. You will always find yourself arguing ad nauseam with people when you are trying to reason them out of a belief that they didn't reason themselves into. Much of this religion mumbo-jumbo is more psychological than you may think, so you have to approach them humbly and openly at times so as not to scare them. A religious belief is flimsy. It's like a house of cards. The foundation is faith. For the most part, religious people don't even think about their faith. You challenging their beliefs is like a stiff breeze in the direction of thier flimsy structure. They're programmed to throw up an automatic defense, and they'll grasp for anything to do so, so long is it makes sense to them. They won't hesitate to throw logic out the window, but remember, they don't know that logic should even apply or matter! Try using the socratic method. People that have religious beliefs love to make knowledge claims. They love to pretend to know things they do not, and in fact, cannot know. Socrates dedicated his life to finding these people, and exposing their ignorance, and for the most part, all he would have to do is ask questions, and then offer them inferences that he would derrive from their statements. Ultimately the person making the claims will find themselves refuting their own statements.

However, religious people are a weird breed. Inside their mind is a safe. Sealed inside is their belief in God. They've lost the combination long ago, and when you talk to these people, you are literally trying as many combinations as you can think of to crack the safe, and expose the contents of the safe for the hoax that lies within. When you think of it this way, it's really no surpise that such a task would prove to be frustrating. Nevertheless, each combination you think of makes YOU sharper. Read books, practice on here...and whatever you do...stand your ground. There's a thread going that's actually dedicated to this very thing (talking about your Atheism to religious familiies). I don't know if anyone has referred you yet, but here:

http://atheistforums.org/thread-22116.html

Welcome to the forums, and relax. There's nothing scary about going to mass or Sunday service. It's actually quite entertaining to me now. It takes me back to when I was a child, willing to believe anything. I'm amazed at how many adults continue to believe what I worked out at your age to be a joke. I read The Bible because it's a tool. Christians will bring it up against you. It helps to know the things that are in the book. Christians know lots of scriptures that make them feel good. What they don't count on is that you will know those too, but you also know the ones that they've ignored. The instructions from their God that blatantly endorse slavery, stoning your wives, and killing your children should they talk back. These are all tools that will broaden the amount of combinations you can try on the safe. Somebody hacked into mine, and I am eternally thankful. Faith is a virus, a mental disorder. Either ignore it, or intervene. The choice is yours. I'm available anytime you wanna chit-chat. Hit me up with a PM or something if you want. See ya around the forums. Welcome!

---

Go through the motions. They can't make you believe in their bullshit.

I hate bing dishonest at church, makes me so anxious. I have to constantly lie when I'm there and it sucks because even with the crazy beliefs there are some nice people there.

Of course there are nice people there. But remember, offense is taken, not given. I'm not saying you should walk into church and challenge your pastor to a debate on Sunday morning (would be awesome thought), but the entire system that church is founded upon rests on a dishonest foundation. In church, respect their opinions in the same way you would respect that somebody thinks their kids are beautiful. But outside, should they impose their beliefs on you and extend them beyond their subjective opinion and into your objective reality, rip them to shreads. People deserve dignity, beliefs do not. Slavery was believed to be ok at some point. The oppression of women was too, and remains that way in some countries. If nobody is willing to throw the bullshit flag, bad beliefs will consume our society. Have at 'em hoss.

[Captain Colostomy]

Oh yeah. Sure. We can do that all day long.
Shut up. No you shut up. NO YOU!
Life ain't always black and white - therefore lie about being a Christian when you're not.

You goddamned right, lie about it. Funny how christians shit themselves over the sanctity of life, but willingly throw it away to be a stupid fucking martyr. Sometimes a bald faced lie is the best course of action. Quit pushing your guilt and wonky ass moralistic codswallop on this kid.

[Cheapthrills]

In your shoes I think I would just go with the flow for now, in fact take it as an opportunity.

I doubt you are going to be reconverted and being exposed to it will surely give you a far deeper basis for your atheism.

In all the church activities and retreats you have to take part in, do you ever suspect other kids of disbelief as well? It could be interesting to befriend, support and be supported by someone dealing with similar issues as yourself.

[pocaracas]

My 2 cents...
If you think your parents will give you a damn hard time if you flat out refuse to do that, then you should just do it. You're their child, you should obey.
If you think your parents can be reasoned with... at least one of them... then you may do well to talk to them about what you really (don't) believe in.

They are your parents, you should know them... we don't know them!

People around here will advise you based on stories they hear from other people... it's not very nice to be thrown out from your home, by your own parents and that sort of thing does happen... but parents, down deep, only want what they think is best for their children. (very careful word choice, on this last sentence... read it twice! )

You can just tell them that you don't believe, but you'll go on with the confirmation, if that is their wish... it will make no sense whatsoever, I know, but it might be a nice middle ground for them to get acquainted with your position and, eventually, just allow you to chose if you do indeed go through with the actual ceremony or not.

A good strategy not to tell them but provide hints is to keep a "god is not great" book lying around, next to something like "the god delusion" or "the end of faith"...

Do what you feel is right and keeps the family together.