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Current time: December 15, 2024, 2:52 pm

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joke time
RE: joke time
Keep 'em on their toes......

If they droop - tighten the rope...


Smile
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RE: joke time
(August 16, 2020 at 8:47 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: I tried ordering t-shirts for our local psychics club.

I got the order wrong.

I ordered large and XL but apparently they're all mediums.

OMG!  I read it the first time as "physics club", and couldn't understand the punch-line until I went back.

Anybody else, or am I the only idiot here?
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
mental typo = dylexia Dunno
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
(August 22, 2020 at 9:08 pm)ignoramus Wrote: mental typo = dylexia Dunno

Dyslecs of the world, untie!  Hehe
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
As long as we don't make fun of incontinence! My dad had it. Now I do. It runs in my jeans.

I rang the bowel incontinence help line once. They told me to hold. Sorry, no can do!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
This is Rudolph. He is known as Rudolph the Red.
[Image: image.png]

He told his woman, tonight, it is going to rain! She asked: How do you know?

He said:

No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply
RE: joke time
(August 23, 2020 at 8:57 am)ignoramus Wrote: This is Rudolph. He is known as Rudolph the Red.
[Image: image.png]

He told his woman, tonight, it is going to rain! She asked: How do you know?

He said:


My wife just banned me from the house for telling this one.
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RE: joke time
(August 23, 2020 at 9:50 am)polymath257 Wrote:
(August 23, 2020 at 8:57 am)ignoramus Wrote: This is Rudolph. He is known as Rudolph the Red.
[Image: image.png]

He told his woman, tonight, it is going to rain! She asked: How do you know?

He said:


My wife just banned me from the house for telling this one.

She couldn't reach a knife, huh?

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
Patient, "So you're saying I can masturbate whenever and wherever I want?"

Me, "No. I'm telling you that you could have a stroke at any time."

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
Two guys and a union worker were fishing on a lake one day, when Jesus walked across the water and joined them in the boat. When the three astonished men had settled down enough to speak, the first guy asked, humbly, “Jesus, I’ve suffered from back pain ever since I took shrapnel in the Vietnam War…could you help me?”

“Of course, my son,” Jesus said, and when he touched the man’s back, he felt relief for the first time in years.

The second man, who wore very thick glasses and had a hard time reading and driving, asked if Jesus could do anything about his eyesight.

Jesus smiled, removed the man’s glasses and tossed them in the lake. When they hit the water, the man’s eyes cleared, and he could see everything distinctly.

When Jesus turned to heal the union worker, the guy put his hands up and cried, defensively, “DON’T TOUCH ME! I’m on long-term disability!”
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