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**BrianSoddingBoru4** · April 16, 2021 at 5:04 am

(April 16, 2021 at 4:55 am)The Valkyrie Wrote:
(April 16, 2021 at 4:50 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I recent purchased an old album called 'Sounds Wasps Make'. When I got it home and played it, I thought, 'This doesn't sound anything like wasp sounds.'

Then I realized I was playing the bee side.

Boru

This is why the world must end!

You're just mad because you didn't post it first.

Boru

**The Valkyrie** · April 16, 2021 at 5:17 am

(April 16, 2021 at 5:04 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote:
(April 16, 2021 at 4:55 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: This is why the world must end!

You're just mad because you didn't post it first.

Boru

I'm just mad because I'm not drunk yet.

vulcanlogician · April 16, 2021 at 9:54 pm

Why isn't there a pregnant barbie doll?

Because Ken comes in another box.

**BrianSoddingBoru4** · April 17, 2021 at 5:57 am

A priest is making the rounds of his parishioner's homes when he sees a nun with a broken bicycle by the side of the road. He pulls over, finds he can't fix the bike, and offers the nun a lift back to the convent.

During the drive, the nun crossers her legs, causing her habit to shift and expose a bit of thigh. Overcome, the priest places his hand on her leg and gives a little squeeze. 'Father!', says the nun. 'Remember Luke 14:10!. The priest apologizes and removes his hand.

A little later on, he changes gears and his hand lands on her thigh again. 'Father!', she says. 'Remember Luke 14:10!'

They arrive at the convent, the nun thanks him and says, 'Don't forget, Father - Luke 14:10!'

Back at the vestry, the priest takes down his Bible and opens it to Luke 14:10, where he reads,

Boru

**The Valkyrie** · April 18, 2021 at 4:48 am

Seeing my doctor.

"Beccs, pick a starsign."

"Ummm, okay. Capricorn."

"I'm hardly going to tell you that you have Capricorn. Pick another!"

**The Valkyrie** · April 18, 2021 at 5:08 am

Iggy has discovered that it is illegal to mix human and whale DNA.

Also, he's no longer welcome at SeaWorld..

A. Secular Human · (This post was last modified: April 18, 2021 at 9:16 pm by A. Secular Human.)

(April 18, 2021 at 4:48 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: Seeing my doctor.

"Beccs, pick a starsign."

"Ummm, okay. Capricorn."

"I'm hardly going to tell you that you have Capricorn. Pick another!"

It sure as hell isn't Virgo!

AniKoferBo · April 18, 2021 at 11:14 pm

Joe sees little Susie crying, and digging a hole in her back yard. Joe: 'What are you digging this hole for?'
Susie: 'My fish died, and I'm burying him.'
Joe: 'That's a big hole for a fish!'
Susie: 'Well, he's inside your damn cat!'

**The Valkyrie** · April 19, 2021 at 5:24 am

They're putting a clock into the leaning tower of Pisa.

That way it will have both the time and the inclination.

**The Valkyrie** · (This post was last modified: April 19, 2021 at 5:31 am by The Valkyrie.)

At work today:

Patient, "Am I sick?"

Me, "No. But Mercury is in Uranus."

Patient, "You're not into astrology??"

"Me, "No, but I broke my thermometer."

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