Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 15, 2024, 1:36 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
joke time
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35310
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4881
RE: joke time
May 6, 2021 at 5:31 am
(May 6, 2021 at 3:57 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Keeping tropical fish at home can have a calming effect on the human brain. You know, because of all the indoor fins.

Boru

[Image: Ez5-DG1-IVc-AMzv2c.jpg]

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
Fake Messiah Offline
Activist for Sin
*****
Religious Views: Prozac supplants exorcism
Posts: 17123
Threads: 462
Joined: March 29, 2015
Reputation: 30
#4882
RE: joke time
May 6, 2021 at 6:00 am
YEC: EVOLUTION MAKES NO SENSE!

Me: How did God do it?

YEC: GOD IS BEYOND OUR UNDERSTANDING!

Me: So God makes no sense.

YEC: EXACTLY!!! ... wait.
teachings of the Bible are so muddled and self-contradictory that it was possible for Christians to happily burn heretics alive for five long centuries. It was even possible for the most venerated patriarchs of the Church, like St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas, to conclude that heretics should be tortured (Augustine) or killed outright (Aquinas). Martin Luther and John Calvin advocated the wholesale murder of heretics, apostates, Jews, and witches. - Sam Harris, "Letter To A Christian Nation"
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35310
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4883
RE: joke time
May 6, 2021 at 6:13 pm
I went to the library and asked if they have the new book on Pavlov's dog and Shrodinger's cat.

The librarian said it rings a bell but she doesn't know if it's in or not.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
*******
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 46314
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#4884
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 5:29 am
We're thinking of selling this place and moving into a bouncy house. The rent will be high, but that's mostly because of inflation.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#4885
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 7:39 am
[Image: giphy.gif]
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply
polymath257 Offline
Member
***
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 2412
Threads: 5
Joined: January 3, 2018
Reputation: 22
#4886
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 9:18 am
(April 30, 2021 at 8:48 pm)SUNGULA Wrote: [Image: flat,750x,075,f-pad,750x1000,f8f8f8.jpg]

And at more advanced levels, you get into groups.
Find
Reply
onlinebiker Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: cynical S.O.B.
Posts: 9538
Threads: 410
Joined: October 3, 2018
Reputation: 17
#4887
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 11:05 am (This post was last modified: May 7, 2021 at 11:06 am by onlinebiker.)
Sex is like air.


It' s no big deal until you're not getting any.
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
*******
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 46314
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#4888
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 11:15 am
‘Sex is like smoking. If you don’t inhale, it won’t hurt you.’ - George Burns

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
A. Secular Human Offline
Grand Poobah, Atheist Nerds of the U. S.
***
Religious Views: God who?
Posts: 1605
Threads: 0
Joined: October 2, 2018
Reputation: 11
#4889
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 7:45 pm
(May 6, 2021 at 5:31 am)The Valkyrie Wrote:
(May 6, 2021 at 3:57 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: Keeping tropical fish at home can have a calming effect on the human brain. You know, because of all the indoor fins.

Boru

[Image: Ez5-DG1-IVc-AMzv2c.jpg]

Needs an extended middle toe.
Disappointing theists since 1968!
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35310
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4890
RE: joke time
May 7, 2021 at 10:43 pm
I killed someone in a Lebanese restaurant.

The police are trying to charge me with hummuside.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  No joke -- I have decided to convert to Christianity! Jehanne 10 2748 April 23, 2021 at 9:54 pm
Last Post: arewethereyet
  A sacred joke. Mystic 15 3310 January 20, 2018 at 10:00 pm
Last Post: Cyberman
  Big Bang Theory Neil Tyson joke Brian37 1 1607 May 18, 2016 at 8:07 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  There Has To Be A Joke Here, Somewhere! Minimalist 3 2539 October 1, 2014 at 10:57 pm
Last Post: Zidneya
  Joke Minimalist 59 18802 June 27, 2014 at 12:25 am
Last Post: Ravenshire
  A little joke Sup 11 4743 April 10, 2014 at 7:33 pm
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  Evolution (is a) joke JesusLover1 12 9434 March 2, 2014 at 6:24 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Preacher joke 02 Drich 2 1993 February 12, 2014 at 7:15 am
Last Post: NoraBrimstone
  Preacher joke 01 Drich 8 4844 January 20, 2014 at 12:31 am
Last Post: Drich
  Make Up An Atheist Joke freedomfromforum 5 3050 October 6, 2013 at 12:30 am
Last Post: Angrboda



Users browsing this thread: 120 Guest(s)