Online dating truthers

[Whateverist]

I'm Beccs.

You don't want to date me.  You won't survive.

But what a way to go.

[The Valkyrie]

I'm Beccs.

You don't want to date me.  You won't survive.

But what a way to go.

[Edwardo Piet]

I fucking love that clip

[SteelCurtain]

Mine would go a little something like this:

Name's MCB---you can call me Milk Chocolate.

I'm 31, a workaholic, in school full time as well--so I really have no time for anyone else. I'm going gray and slowly bald thanks to my father's strong genes. I haven't yet given up on it, I keep telling myself that maybe this is as thin as it will get.

I am a sports fanatic. I'm literally psychotic when it comes to the Steelers. I know this. I own it. It's my cross to bear. (Hold on, I just need to read this Training Camp blog.) Where were we? I am outgoing, at my best in groups. I like to be the center of attention but don't need to be. I love science. I love computers. I am a shill for Google products.

I'm brown. I listen to all of the musics. Except for country. And death metal. I love dogs and work for a local Golden Retriever rescue when I have time. My main man Tanner is probably my profile pic. He's the cutest puppers on the planet. If you get uncomfortable around overt dog affection, we're not gonna get along.

If you ever order a Budweiser, Miller, or Coors product around me, we can't be friends.

Nice to meet you.

[Little lunch]

I'm Beccs.

You don't want to date me.  You won't survive.

I'd still like to come to one of your New years eve nudist parties in Byron Bay though.
I promise not to touch and there'll even be a place to hang your towel.

[pocaracas]

I'm Beccs.

You don't want to date me.  You won't survive.

I'd still like to come to one of your New years eve nudist parties in Byron Bay though.
I promise not to touch and there'll even be a place to hang your towel.

I don't think that "no touching" is a plus, on those...

In other words - you're probably required to touch.

[Joods]

I don't know why I'm doing this, but I'll add mine... scary as it is:

Hi. I'm NymphAdora. My nickname is NOT Nympho.
I'm a decrepit 45 years old.
I'm overweight. Fuck it - I'm fat.
I don't think I'm very pretty and clearly, makeup does NOT help my looks at all.
Life hasn't been very kind to me.
I have issues - trust issues, control issues, issues with people lacking common sense, issues with people not knowing how to drive, issues with people not taking initiative.
I absolutely hate being lied to. It can be a deal breaker.
I talk too much. I reveal way too much about my life to total strangers. This has got to be one of my biggest downfalls.
I made my first mid-life crisis decision in 2015 when I decided to go back to school.
Based on my schooling, I'll probably critique your hair without you asking me to. I'll probably want to cut it or color it.
I made my second mid-life crisis decision in 2016, when I bought a pair of purple speed skates. Yes, I actually use them. No, I don't go very fast.
I have a redneck, geeky, nerdy side that I'll happily show you if you stick around long enough.
I drink directly from a two liter bottle of soda. To hell with using a glass.
I don't know how to cook for less than five people. That's a plus if you like to eat a lot of food.
I like to eat a lot of food.
I don't measure things when I cook. I'm Italian.
I met John Gotti when I was a kid. Several times. No kidding.
I am proud to be an atheist. Don't invite me to church. I'll probably laugh at you.
People think I'm brass and that I come on too strong. Many don't like my personality because of that. Oh well. I'm not trying to win over any popularity contests in life. People either like me or they don't. I'm going to keep living regardless.
I say the word "fuck" a lot.
I have baggage that will most likely haunt me for the rest of my life.
I'm not opposed to having a sugar daddy. Preferably one who isn't interested in having sex. Just give me the damn money and leave me alone.
I'll probably never grow up. Seriously, I feel like I'm mentally stuck somewhere in my early 20's.

And most importantly:
I don't run. If you see me running, you should probably start running too because something is most likely chasing me.

[downbeatplumb]

I drink directly from a two liter bottle of soda. Fuck using a glass.

I was with you up to this. (oh and how do you fuck using a glass?)

[Joods]

I should probably edit that. lol

[Edwardo Piet]

I've never fucked using a glass either, but I'll give anything a shot once.

Don't knock it until you've tried it, eh?

* Edwardo Piet jumps off cliff

Shouldn't have tried that.