Why should I be ashamed? A rant by a Mexican.

[brewer]

You'd better watch out puta, we all carry knives. Don't make me cut you!

[RoadRunner79]

Unless there was a particular problem with some Mexicans in your area, that seems just ridiculous to me.

Of course, I did live in an area, which was pretty racists.   I had my co-workers once telling me, that if a Black Baptist minister moved in next door, that it would lower your property value.   I asked if they knew of any places like this... a cheap house with nice neighbors sounded right up my ally.

[vulcanlogician]

My two cents: it could be that your friend has something to learn about Mexicans... like they are human beings first and Mexicans second. Sometimes little weird moments like that are opportunities for growth. I like to remain optimistic when confronted with situations like that.

But then again, my optimism has gotten me in trouble sometimes. I guess its worth keeping in mind that you might have gotten a peek at her inner ignorance. If she really has a negative opinion of Mexicans, you don't need to put up with her shit.

But let me end on a positive note. If she is acting funny about your ethnicity, maybe she's just internalized some bad ideas along the way. What better way to fix that then to demonstrate that her preconceived notions are wrong? All of us have misunderstandings of one kind or another. It's nice when people are patient with us in those circumstances, provided we are willing to open our minds and challenge our prejudices.

[LadyForCamus]

I’m sorry you have to have experiences like this, Ivy. ☹️ I can’t imagine how it must make you feel. It doesn’t seem like your friend is a very empathetic person.

[Fireball]

Yeah, what your friend did is pretty inconsiderate and/or prejudiced. You're a hottie, no matter what your derivation.   It would be a better place (the entire world!) if people would just look at people as people as opposed to some "other", whatever that "other" entailed. Unless, of course, you turned out to be an xtian.

[Little lunch]

Come to Australia and mentioning you're Mexican will get you minor celebrity status.
Don't mention you're American to loudly though. :-)

[The Valkyrie]

Come to Australia and mentioning you're Mexican will get you minor celebrity status.
Don't mention you're American to loudly though. :-)

If you do remember to say, "I hate Trump and didn't vote for him!"

Or say you're a political refugee from an evil regime.

On second thought, come to NZ.

[J a c k]

Thank you all for your kind responses. I love you.

[Godscreated]

Maybe she was afraid of unwanted attention from Trump supporters who wouldn't care about verbally assaulting you.

I supported Trump and have no problem with Mexicans and I would never verbally abuse anyone who is different than I am, know why, because I'm different than they are. I'm not going to get into the political stuff here because that's not what this thread is about. Jack's friend was insecure with her being Mexican and both will have to work that out and I hope they do. You think you can lump all people into little piles by politics or religion and ect., well you can't. Your post is nothing different than what Jack's friend did to her and I will not apologize for supporting Trump nor loving Mexican food. I have a favorite Mexican restaurant I go to just because Hector does authentic food and then he also does food for the American taste buds.

GC

---

Yeah, what your friend did is pretty inconsiderate and/or prejudiced. You're a hottie, no matter what your derivation.   It would be a better place (the entire world!) if people would just look at people as people as opposed to some "other", whatever that "other" entailed. Unless, of course, you turned out to be an xtian.

 You almost had it right, too bad for the last few words of your post.

GC

---

---

I have been giving this a lot of thought over the weekend and the more I think about it, the angrier I get.

I was sitting at a Thai restaurant with a friend. We were talking about how regions adapt ethnic foods to their own taste. Americans love Taco Bell, for example, yet Mexican tacos are nothing like that. Chinese food in America is not authentic. We were sharing examples like these and I made a comment in my regular voice, no change in tone or anything, “Well, me being Mexican, I admit we make most foods spicy even when the authentic version doesn’t go that way.” When I said I was Mexican, my friend’s eyeballs wanted to pop out and her head made a sudden jerk from side to side to see if anyone heard. She realized what she did and tried to go back to normal. I let it go.

Then on another occasion we were sitting at a bar. “Well, my Mexican instinct tells me to try it, but I won’t, because I don’t handle tequila very well.” Again, when I mentioned being Mexican, same reaction.

She’s not Mexican, by the way. So, I asked her about last time and this time and waited for her explanation. Maybe I was taking it the wrong way. Our conversation went something like this:
She: oh, I didn’t mean to seem shocked by you, but you just took me by surprise and I guess I wanted to see how people would react. You just yelled it!
Me: I didn’t yell it. The tone in my voice and the volume never changed.
She: it felt that way.
Me: Why?
She: Well, you just blurted it out as if nothing.
Me: nothing what? Like it’s not a swear word? Like it’s ok to be Mexican?
She: Not like that... it’s just that you’re so like whatever about it.
Me: why shouldn’t I be?
She: I don’t know. I’m not Mexican. I don’t know how I’d talk about it in public. It makes me nervous. Give me a break.

Well, damn.
I should whisper the word Mexican in public, because omg how will people react.

I’m MEXICAN and I’m AMERICAN and my ethnicity will pop up into my conversations because it’s part of my fucken identity and I’m PROUD of my background and I will NOT whisper it to someone who isn’t Mexican so she doesn’t lose her comfort in her perfectly label acceptable world.

I remember a dude from Chile who lives in LA. He once asked me how I liked living in the USA. It was an odd question to me, because I was born here and mostly raised here, too. “I love it. It’s my home.” He said, “Really? Don’t you know?” I asked what he meant. He says, “That everyone in the US hates Mexicans. They confuse all of the rest of us with you and we have to explain that not all brown people are Mexican. Your people are really hated in the US.” Dude. Don’t I know about racism and prejudice? Yes. Don’t I know that there’s people who would love to have a reason to say, “See! Told you Mexicans are criminals!” Don’t I know other minorities also look down on us and hate being confused with one of us? Don’t I know that, “You’re too pretty to be Mexican,” is really an insult? Don’t I know? Yes, mother fucker, I know.

But I also know that this is MY country and nobody can take that from me. I know that MY family has made our people proud. I know that not everyone around us thinks the same way and I know that I am NOT ashamed of who I am or what blood is keeping me alive.

Why the fuck should I be ashamed? I grew up being ashamed of so many parts of my identity, and I won’t waste my adulthood being prudent about something like my race. There is no merit in your place of birth, and there is no merit in your bloodline. You didn’t earn it. You had no choice. I do, however, have a choice in how I identify myself and how I carry my labels. People will label people and let me tell you something. I’ll wear all my labels proudly. They are my skin. They are my story.

I will not whisper my name.

---

End rant.

 Jack it's bad when someone treats you like you have something wrong with you no matter the reason, I get that here all the time but then this isn't about me. I don't have any idea what you have decided to do about your friend but if she's a good friend then a friendship is worth saving if the other will try also. A serious talk away from others (because she seems sensitive around others) might be the best thing to do, she might open up more. In the end it is your decision, you are living in the situation and see those things that the rest of us can't. Good luck with whatever you choose. By the way I would be glad to eat an authentic Mexican meal with you, it is my favorite food.

GC

[Amarok]

I supported Trump and have no problem with Mexicans and I would never verbally abuse anyone who is different than I am, know why, because I'm different than they are. I'm not going to get into the political stuff here because that's not what this thread is about. Jack's friend was insecure with her being Mexican and both will have to work that out and I hope they do. You think you can lump all people into little piles by politics or religion and ect., well you can't. Your post is nothing different than what Jack's friend did to her and I will not apologize for supporting Trump nor loving Mexican food. I have a favorite Mexican restaurant I go to just because Hector does authentic food and then he also does food for the American taste buds.

GC

Nope their is a huge difference jacks friend was being a bigot . You just kiss the boots of one . And your a hypocrite .