Why do I feel so awkward when someone refuses a present from me?

[The Grand Nudger]

My favorite example of the gifting dynamic comes to us from the Beaver Wars.  For some needed setup, understand that we're talking about a culture that places capture over kill in a guerrilla framework and has suffered immense losses to it's population.  The most worthy thing a combatant can do (because it's harder) is take you alive.  What to do, now, with the bounty that demonstrates your prowess?  You gift the lucky fucker!  There were familial holes in their society, and captives could be paraded before the grieving as replacement sons and fathers and daughters and mothers who would inherit the names, stations, possessions, and responsibilities of the departed.  

If a grieving person rejected the gift then it would diminish the conceptual units of honor their capture manufactured, perpetuate the state of want for the bereaved, and consign the captive to execution.

Imagine how awkward that would feel, lol.

[Athene]

I'd rather not receive gifts from people I'm not particularly close to (co-workers, neighbors, extended family members, etc.) because I feel that what they're actually giving me is an obligation to return a gift or favor, or perhaps a pass of some sort. The idea of "owing one" to people I don't particularly like or feel indifferent towards is irksome to me, so my tendency is to politely decline such gestures. 

If refusing a gift isn't possible or prudent, I will return a gift or favor of some sort posthaste in order to settle my perceived "debt" to them quickly. 
Bam...we're square. 
That way, I don't feel bad when they begin casually hinting that they need someone to walk their yapping dogs when they go out of town, to switch shifts with them and pick up an overnight or two, or somebody to drop them off at the airport by 4am in the middle of a work week. 

If I know a person to be truly sincere and/or appreciative that's different, of course. But not everyone who bestows sudden gifts is motivated by mere thoughtfulness. 
Often enough, they're just priming the pump.

[Der/die AtheistIn]

Depends on the culture and your relationship with the giver.  Eg In Japan, one bows politely ,says thank you, and opens the gift later, in private. Japanese society has a complex system of reciprocal gift giving, as well as things it is impolite to give...... Just hope you never become involved, it can be a nightmare.

here in Oz, I was taught that the minimal polite response is "thank you".

"You shouldn't have" is false modesty and disrespects and often annoys the giver. To refuse a gift is churlish.

In my country there is often an implicit reciprocity with gifts, especially with family.

Gae Bolga  is right I think; each country has its own customs of reciprocity, whether in goods or favours* .This often seems unrelated to Christian
values.

Think of Don Corleone's 'favours'.  Real life is a lot like that, differing only by degree.

In my country it's tradition to reject the present at first a few times, then at the end to accept it. It's considered impolite to accept it right away.
However, this tradition is dying.
As a kid I didn't follow it, as an adult I do when talking with people from my country, though sometimes they won't insist, which makes me confused to which tradition to follow.

[tackattack]

Another gifting related tradition that has unfortunately died, the R.S.V.P.. You can't get an accurate catering headcount outside of people you interact with daily any more. Infuriating, how hard is it to text with, "yup C U at 4."

[fredd bear]

"In my country it's tradition to reject the present at first a few times, then at the end to accept it"

Yep, common custom in asian countries. Which country?

[Der/die AtheistIn]

"In my country it's tradition to reject the present at first a few times, then at the end to accept it"

Yep, common custom  in  asian countries. Which country?

A very asian Country called Romania,  except it's in Eastern Europe 

[fredd bear]

"In my country it's tradition to reject the present at first a few times, then at the end to accept it"

Yep, common custom  in  asian countries. Which country?

A very asian Country called Romania,   except it's in Eastern Europe 

 Ah, fascinating. I didn't know that, thank you..

[Der/die AtheistIn]

A very asian Country called Romania,   except it's in Eastern Europe 

 Ah, fascinating. I didn't know that, thank you..

To be clear, I was joking when I said that Romania is asian, but the custom mentioned is true.

[Dundee]

"You shouldn't have" is false modesty and disrespects and often annoys the giver.

So it is!
It is a stupid reaction!

[brewer]

"You shouldn't have" is false modesty and disrespects and often annoys the giver.

So it is!
It is a stupid reaction!

The same as digging up a thread that's been dead for a year.