I feel kind of uncomfortable going to counseling

[Der/die AtheistIn]

I expressed my anger towards one of my parents mistakes multiple times. My anger has become serious, so I made an appointment for counseling. The problem is, I don't feel comfortable talking about this particular subject to my therapist. 
My parents' mistake has to do with religion, but I don't want counseling for my disagreement with religion. Yeah, religion makes me sometimes angry, but not to the point where I have problems controlling myself. I also don't fear being judged for my atheism on a regular basis. I don't know if my therapist is religious or not, and as much as I complained about religious in the past - including moderates - I won't mind my counselor being religious. All that I want from him is that he does his job right. I don't want to discuss with my therapist whenever religion is good or bad or how to live as an atheist, I just want to discuss with him about the fact that I was brainwashed by fundamentalists for almost a decade right under my parents noses, and when they found out they didn't understand how bad the situation was.
Here in Europe people are usually more indifferent towards other religions and atheism and most christians are moderates. But part of me still fears that my therapist might want to convince me to return to my religion. 
Also, I never talked directly to someone about my parents' mistake. The most I did was writing on this forum where nobody knows my real name. I know that the counselor will keep my secret and I met him before, I highly doubt that he'll judge me, but I still feel very uncomfortable talking to him about this.
What should I do?

[Brian37]

I expressed my anger towards one of my parents mistakes multiple times. My anger has become serious, so I made an appointment for counseling. The problem is, I don't feel comfortable talking about this particular subject to my therapist. 
My parents' mistake has to do with religion, but I don't want counseling for my disagreement with religion. Yeah, religion makes me sometimes angry, but not to the point where I have problems controlling myself. I also don't fear being judged for my atheism on a regular basis. I don't know if my therapist is religious or not, and as much as I complained about religious in the past - including moderates - I won't mind my counselor being religious. All that I want from him is that he does his job right. I don't want to discuss with my therapist whenever religion is good or bad or how to live as an atheist, I just want to discuss with him about the fact that I was brainwashed by fundamentalists for almost a decade right under my parents noses, and when they found out they didn't understand how bad the situation was.
Here in Europe people are usually more indifferent towards other religions and atheism and most christians are moderates. But part of me still fears that my therapist might want to convince me to return to my religion. 
Also, I never talked directly to someone about my parents' mistake. The most I did was writing on this forum where nobody knows my real name. I know that the counselor will keep my secret and I met him before, I highly doubt that he'll judge me, but I still feel very uncomfortable talking to him about this.
What should I do?

You seriously need to get over this fear if you want help. Any ethical professional isn't going to violate that trust. The only time they ethically do that is if you say things that are physical threats to others, or admissions to violence to others. So if you are not threatening anyone with violence you should have nothing to worry about.

If they are pointing you to a religion then you can simply tell them to skip it. If they keep pushing it, then they are not being ethical. 

There are doctors and even psychologists whom hold a religious belief, but do ethically leave it at the door. If they cannot honor your wish to leave religion out of the therapy, then you should find someone else.

[Der/die AtheistIn]

You seriously need to get over this fear if you want help. Any ethical professional isn't going to violate that trust. The only time they ethically do that is if you say things that are physical threats to others, or admissions to violence to others. So if you are not threatening anyone with violence you should have nothing to worry about.

If they are pointing you to a religion then you can simply tell them to skip it. If they keep pushing it, then they are not being ethical. 

There are doctors and even psychologists whom hold a religious belief, but do ethically leave it at the door. If they cannot honor your wish to leave religion out of the therapy, then you should find someone else.

Thank you very much.
One more question, If someone tries to convert you to a religion, how do you politely tell them that you don't want to. I personally don't feel like I have to tell my therapist about my belief at all. If that will be the case, how can I tell him that I don't want to express it?

[Brian37]

You seriously need to get over this fear if you want help. Any ethical professional isn't going to violate that trust. The only time they ethically do that is if you say things that are physical threats to others, or admissions to violence to others. So if you are not threatening anyone with violence you should have nothing to worry about.

If they are pointing you to a religion then you can simply tell them to skip it. If they keep pushing it, then they are not being ethical. 

There are doctors and even psychologists whom hold a religious belief, but do ethically leave it at the door. If they cannot honor your wish to leave religion out of the therapy, then you should find someone else.

Thank you very much.
One more question, If someone tries to convert you to a religion, how do you politely tell them that you don't want to. I personally don't feel like I have to tell my therapist about my belief at all. If that will be the case, how can I tell him that I don't want to express it?

Are you assuming this is what your therapist will do, or have they already tried selling religion to you?

If they have not done that don't assume they will try. If they have tried to sell you it, tell them to stop. If they do not, and continue to push religion, find another therapist.

This is about you, not them, not their agenda. An ethical therapist will leave their personal beliefs at the door. 

I have noticed on thing about you that is consistent when you talk about your relationships with others in general. You worry too much about what others think, and not enough about your own personal mental health. You DO NOT have to want revenge, or start a war with others when you state your feelings to others. Don't be a doormat. You can be civil in telling someone you don't want them to do certain things. But if they do continue, then it is up to you how you respond. You can only control yourself, not others.

The  conversation with your therapist can go like this.

Therapist, "Have you thought about going to church?"

You, "That is not my thing, I do want help, I just don't want religion to get it."

If they are ethical they will say

Therapist, "Ok, I can do that."

Or, "Well, I can't do that, but I'd be willing to point you to someone you'd be comfortable with."

If they are simply a fraud peddling religion they'd say,

Therapist," But you need Jesus?Allah/Yahweh."

That is when you simply get up, and walk out, and not feel the slightest  bit sorry. It is about YOU, not them.

[Der/die AtheistIn]

Are you assuming this is what your therapist will do, or have they already tried selling religion to you?

If they have not done that don't assume they will try. If they have tried to sell you it, tell them to stop. If they do not, and continue to push religion, find another therapist.

This is about you, not them, not their agenda. An ethical therapist will leave their personal beliefs at the door. 

I have noticed on thing about you that is consistent when you talk about your relationships with others in general. You worry too much about what others think, and not enough about your own personal mental health. You DO NOT have to want revenge, or start a war with others when you state your feelings to others. Don't be a doormat. You can be civil in telling someone you don't want them to do certain things. But if they do continue, then it is up to you how you respond. You can only control yourself, not others.

The  conversation with your therapist can go like this.

Therapist, "Have you thought about going to church?"

You, "That is not my thing, I do want help, I just don't want religion to get it."

If they are ethical they will say

Therapist, "Ok, I can do that."

Or, "Well, I can't do that, but I'd be willing to point you to someone you'd be comfortable with."

If they are simply a fraud peddling religion they'd say,

Therapist," But you need Jesus?Allah/Yahweh."

That is when you simply get up, and walk out, and not feel the slightest  bit sorry. It is about YOU, not them.

Thanks

[Brian37]

Trust me, there are plenty of secular non religious therapists out there, just keep looking if you need to. And you always have secular non religious people, like here, to talk to as well. So do not feel like you are alone.

---

I will say Die, there is still one thing you do need to do, even with a secular therapist. LISTEN AND LEARN. They can listen to you, explain to you how your can interact with others and have disagreements and healthy relationships. Even a secular therapist is going to tell you things about yourself you may need to work on.

[robvalue]

I can’t vouch for every European country, but I would be really surprised if a therapist started preaching about religion. I’d expect that would amount to serious malpractice and they would gets lots of complaints.

[tackattack]

If you're uncomfortable now, wait till he/she starts pointing out problem areas you need to work on. You have to be willing to get help AND genuinely desire help for it to be effective. If you don't feel comfortable then it's because you have or detect religious bias, or you're not fully deep enough in the emotional hole to just give up and admit you need help. If you want help more than you want to feel comfortable, then you'll be in the right place to receive help. Being uncomfortable is just the cost of having enough skin in the game to care, if you see it that way it may help you feel more comfortable getting help.

[Brian37]

If you're uncomfortable now, wait till he/she starts pointing out problem areas you need to work on. You have to be willing to get help AND genuinely desire help for it to be effective. If you don't feel comfortable then it's because you have or detect religious bias, or you're not fully deep enough in the emotional hole to just give up and admit you need help. If you want help more than you want to feel comfortable, then you'll be in the right place to receive help. Being uncomfortable is just the cost of  having enough skin in the game to care, if you see it that way it may help you feel more comfortable getting help.

I already mentioned this in a prior post.

I think Die has every right to ask for secular therapy that does not involve peddling religion. But I do agree, even with non religious therapy Die does have to be willing to be honest about their behaviors and even medical conditions and mental health issues, and listen to the therapist about how to cope with it in a healthy way.

There is no point to asking for help if all you are doing is simply trying to do is look for excuses for the behaviors you claim you want to change.

[mlmooney89]

I live in the bible belt of the USA... even here I'd be shocked to find a professional pushing religion during therapy without that person guiding it. I think you might be over analyzing this and should give the person a benefit of a doubt before you say no. Yes there are professionals who are religious but I've found that more often than not they have sided with science and this is why they are in this field. They see the way the brain works and are trying to fix it.

I mean what is the worst that can happen? They start in on religion being good. You tell them no thank you. They continue. You stop seeing them.

Still though I realllllllly think your chances of that happening are minimal.