Random Humorous Things - A Light-Hearted Thread

[AkiraTheViking]

Alita: Battle Angel just got real!!!

[Darinda]

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

Boru

[Fake Messiah]

I'm speechless

[A. Secular Human]

Check this out! A frikkin' talking robot nurse! How is that going to make anybody feel better?
Developed with comforting covid patients in mind.

conversation with robot:

ME: Will you be honest with me?
Robot: Of course
ME: Why are you really here?
Robot: Because the humans think you're a cesspool of germs and don't want to go near you.
ME: OH, OK.

Also ME: Can you keep secrets?
Robot: Yes, I suppose.
ME: Can you close the curtains, I have some stiffness I want you to look at, but it'll be our secret, mmmkay?






I suppose it won't try to kill me like some people I know!

Ooooh!

"Looky Titz"!

---

I'm speechless

When I taught high school, girls would bring in copies of Cosmo all the time.  It was often just as bad as Penthouse Forums.

I'd take them away every time for them (or their parents) to collect, after school.  Whether it was them, or their parents, depended on how much shit they gave me.  When they'd come in after school, and objected, all I had to do was open to a random page, read what I found there, and ask "is this appropriate for the classroom?" 

Often, the ads were the worst.

[AkiraTheViking]

BILL! BILL! BILL!

---

When I taught high school, girls would bring in copies of Cosmo all the time. It was often just as bad as Penthouse Forums.

I'd take them away every time for them (or their parents) to collect, after school. Whether it was them, or their parents, depended on how much shit they gave me. When they'd come in after school, and objected, all I had to do was open to a random page, read what I found there, and ask "is this appropriate for the classroom?"

Often, the ads were the worst.

I'd give anything to see those parents reaction.

[A. Secular Human]

BILL! BILL! BILL!

---

When I taught high school, girls would bring in copies of Cosmo all the time.  It was often just as bad as Penthouse Forums.

I'd take them away every time for them (or their parents) to collect, after school.  Whether it was them, or their parents, depended on how much shit they gave me.  When they'd come in after school, and objected, all I had to do was open to a random page, read what I found there, and ask "is this appropriate for the classroom?"  

Often, the ads were the worst.

I'd give anything to see those parents reaction.

A surprising number of times, it was their Moms who gave it to them.

[Fireball]

BILL! BILL! BILL!

---

I'd give anything to see those parents reaction.

A surprising number of times, it was their Moms who gave it to them.

I taught school for a couple of years. Physics, Geometry and "Pre-Calculus". One time in a physics lecture, I needed a piece of thin cardboard to make a spacer for something, but the cupboard was bare. A 14 year old girl reached in her purse and tore off a piece, and brought it to me. It was from a box of condoms. I could just tell that she was waiting for my aghast reaction, but I've seen far worse in my life.

[AkiraTheViking]

[A. Secular Human]

A surprising number of times, it was their Moms who gave it to them.

I taught school for a couple of years. Physics, Geometry and "Pre-Calculus". One time in a physics lecture, I needed a piece of thin cardboard to make a spacer for something, but the cupboard was bare. A 14 year old girl reached in her purse and tore off a piece, and brought it to me. It was from a box of condoms. I could just tell that she was waiting for my aghast reaction, but I've seen far worse in my life.

I would have congratulated her on her forethought...and paying attention in Health Science class.