Confession time: I have never asked anyone out.

I've had girlfriends, boyfriends, I'm married... but never once have I asked them for that. I just... interact with people, and the romance happens organically. We talk, we get to know one another, and if things just click, then it happens. I'm at the point now where asking someone out directly just seems forced and awkward, because that's never been how I do it.

If someone likes you, and you like them, there are more ways to communicate that than straight out saying so in some kind of on the spot proposal. Personally, I just like making people feel good, so I offer compliments freely wherever it seems they'll be received well, and people kinda figure out that I think highly and affectionately of them from that.

I'm not sure how helpful this advice is, by the way: I'm pretty weird when it comes to relationships... but it does work for me.

(August 19, 2016 at 1:26 pm)Esquilax Wrote: Confession time: I have never asked anyone out.

I've had girlfriends, boyfriends, I'm married... but never once have I asked them for that. I just... interact with people, and the romance happens organically. We talk, we get to know one another, and if things just click, then it happens. I'm at the point now where asking someone out directly just seems forced and awkward, because that's never been how I do it.

If someone likes you, and you like them, there are more ways to communicate that than straight out saying so in some kind of on the spot proposal. Personally, I just like making people feel good, so I offer compliments freely wherever it seems they'll be received well, and people kinda figure out that I think highly and affectionately of them from that.

I'm not sure how helpful this advice is, by the way: I'm pretty weird when it comes to relationships... but it does work for me.  

I'm 12 so I have to wait for love to develop in my mind, so that's why I need to ask her out.
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Esquilax gave you excellent advice, btw.

(August 19, 2016 at 1:32 pm)Excited Penguin Wrote: Esquilax gave you excellent advice, btw.

I know, but I have to wait till I can develop love

Don't say, "I'd crawl over 5 miles of broken glass just to smell the spot where you peed". Very low percentage of success at age 12.

No, I don't think it works like that, nor do I think there's an age restriction for feeling it.

It just happens. You don't plan for it and you don't force it on yourself.

(August 19, 2016 at 1:35 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: Don't say, "I'd crawl over 5 miles of broken glass just to smell the spot where you peed". Very low percentage of success at age 12.

Anything can work in the right tone of voice.

(August 19, 2016 at 1:29 pm)ScienceAf Wrote: I'm 12 so I have to wait for love to develop in my mind, so that's why I need to ask her out.
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I guess, if I had a point at all, what I was saying is, the relationship is more important than the label. Asking her out might help with that, or it might make things more awkward, whereas just allowing things to develop gives you either a date who definitely wants it, or a really good friend if that doesn't pan out. I do get the desire to put words to what you're feeling and level up, so to speak, but don't feel like you have to rush it if you can't find the words that work for you just yet. Every moment you spend with her before you ask gives her a better grasp of you as a person and more comfort around you; you don't need to focus on capital L Love so much as you do the history the two of you share as people.

(August 19, 2016 at 1:40 pm)Esquilax Wrote:

(August 19, 2016 at 1:29 pm)ScienceAf Wrote: I'm 12 so I have to wait for love to develop in my mind, so that's why I need to ask her out.
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I guess, if I had a point at all, what I was saying is, the relationship is more important than the label. Asking her out might help with that, or it might make things more awkward, whereas just allowing things to develop gives you either a date who definitely wants it, or a really good friend if that doesn't pan out. I do get the desire to put words to what you're feeling and level up, so to speak, but don't feel like you have to rush it if you can't find the words that work for you just yet. Every moment you spend with her before you ask gives her a better grasp of you as a person and more comfort around you; you don't need to focus on capital L Love so much as you do the history the two of you share as people.

I'll just tell her I have a crush on her then. And if she doesn't mind I'll let it pan out.

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(August 19, 2016 at 1:36 pm)Excited Penguin Wrote:

(August 19, 2016 at 1:35 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: Don't say, "I'd crawl over 5 miles of broken glass just to smell the spot where you peed". Very low percentage of success at age 12.

Anything can work in the right tone of voice.

My voice can be really deep and soothing but normally when I talk to her it gets all shaky and stuff. But unlike others, atleast I talk.
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No rush anyway dude, you're only 12. I'm 28 next month and I've never been on a date or asked anyone out anywhere (nor has anyone asked me out anywhere).