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Current time: December 15, 2024, 12:46 am

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What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
#11
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
The movie would start with him calling a pheonician woman a bitch and end with him dying, having failed to bring israel to his cult. The backdrop would be overt racism, roman occupation, and insurgent terrorism. We'd see his rich widow backers, we'd see all the attempts he made on his male companions which were unsuccessful. He'd have a foot fetish, and a completely unexplained hatred for shrubs.

Tragi-comedy.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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#12
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
A bad one like all the rest.
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#13
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
Documentary talking to experts.
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#14
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
X-Rated

Titled

Jesus cums first, again


There would be no sequel

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#15
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
I bet an Avengers type movie would work. Where jebus, Zeus, Neptune, Hanuman, and Ra all team up to defeat Palpatine, Voldemort, HAL 9000, and all the minions of imaginationland.


Plot twist, team j loses.
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#16
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
(August 15, 2023 at 1:45 pm)no one Wrote: I bet an Avengers type movie would work. Where jebus, Zeus, Neptune, Hanuman, and Ra all team up to defeat Palpatine, Voldemort, HAL 9000, and all the minions of imaginationland.


Plot twist, team j loses.

Need Dead Pool, Dead Jewl, Dead Enuff, etc., for characters.
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#17
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
J.C. The Extraterrestrial
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#18
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
One that actually deals with the aftermath of this little text:

[Image: -and-the-tombs-broke-open-the-bodies-of-...-42697.jpg]

If nothing else, that's an untapped market. Unless anyone else has found a movie where Jesus has to deal with the living dead that popped up in Jerusalem after his resurrection.
Comparing the Universal Oneness of All Life to Yo Mama since 2010.

[Image: harmlesskitchen.png]

I was born with the gift of laughter and a sense the world is mad.
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#19
RE: What kind of a Jesus movie would you make?
(August 15, 2023 at 9:31 pm)Rev. Rye Wrote: One that actually deals with the aftermath of this little text:

[Image: -and-the-tombs-broke-open-the-bodies-of-...-42697.jpg]

If nothing else, that's an untapped market. Unless anyone else has found a movie where Jesus has to deal with the living dead that popped up in Jerusalem after his resurrection.


Then they need to be hunted down by Woody Harrelson and Emma Stone.
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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