Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: November 10, 2024, 8:14 pm
Thread Rating:
|
Help Me Answer My Evangelical Aunt's Most Recent Email!
|
 RE: Help Me Answer My Evangelical Aunt's Most Recent Email!
December 29, 2011 at 9:36 pm
(This post was last modified: December 29, 2011 at 9:37 pm by Cyberman.)
Jesus - it's Bill Bailey!
Actually, if that Tebow guy is really like that, he's in need of a good slap. Not out of spite or malice; he just invites it.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Have you ever known a jesus freak who didn't need a good slap....or a kick in the nuts?
I don't want this to happen to anyone, but what if Tebow were to get horribly injured? How would someone like my aunt explain that? God's will?
42
God had Denver's opponent to cover the spread.
(December 29, 2011 at 9:40 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Have you ever known a jesus freak who didn't need a good slap....or a kick in the nuts? You make a very compelling case, it has to be said.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
 (December 29, 2011 at 9:47 pm)aleialoura Wrote: I don't want this to happen to anyone, but what if Tebow were to get horribly injured? How would someone like my aunt explain that? God's will? No, your aunt specifically said that all good things are of Christ...so she would not say god did it. Natural reasons happened for that, and god had nothing to do with it. Dont ask her if Jesus let go of Tebow and allow him to fall...it may just make her head explode trying to make up an entirely new batch of lies to cover for the older batch.  (December 29, 2011 at 9:47 pm)aleialoura Wrote: I don't want this to happen to anyone, but what if Tebow were to get horribly injured? How would someone like my aunt explain that? God's will? Since god is completely and totally sovereign, of course everything that happens is god's will.
undefined
 RE: Help Me Answer My Evangelical Aunt's Most Recent Email!
December 30, 2011 at 4:49 pm
(This post was last modified: December 30, 2011 at 5:42 pm by Rokcet Scientist.)
(December 29, 2011 at 11:41 pm)Justtristo Wrote: [...] of course everything that happens is god's will. Which of course makes God an incredibly sadistic asshole. Much worse than Genghis Khan, Hitler, Stalin, Mao, and Pol Pot combined. God knows they tried! (December 29, 2011 at 7:19 pm)Cinjin Wrote: Matthew 6:5-6: "And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men....when thou prayest, enter into thy closet and when thou has shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret...." LOL! I.o.w. this is a Roman Catholic 'closet': ![[Image: 0905stpeters.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=i75.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fi319%2FRokcetScientist%2F0905stpeters.jpg) Now, who can lend me a good beamer? ![[Image: PopeBenedictXVIDeliversUrbiEtOrbiMessage...FdowlB.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=i75.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fi319%2FRokcetScientist%2FPopeBenedictXVIDeliversUrbiEtOrbiMessagePOZJGUnFdowlB.jpg)
Look at all of that beauty around something so ugly
|
|
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »
|
Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)
